Friday, November 05, 2004
Well well well... Ms. Social Worker has come and gone, and it's all out in the open. And I am both relieved and mortified.
They weren't investigating me, they were investigating Shitfoot. The daycare workers reported him--they're mandatory reporters, after all. The story goes something like: Shitfoot was highly agitated and angry when dropping off the kids, and swore at them when they stopped him to ask him about some paperwork. DS was crying, and told a staff member that his daddy had hit him. They reported red marks on his arms, red marks like finger-tips on his back, and his bottom was "very red". DS told workers that daddy had hit him before, but he was not afraid to go home with him. The marks were not there when the social worker got there to check him out. Workers told her that they were concerned that in private, Shitfoot might be taking the discipline too far.
So she wanted to know if I thought it was possible that Shitfoot hurt the kids, etc. Naturally, I'm relieved that this wasn't about anything I did. I knew I hadn't done anything, but I had this whole paranoid idea that someone had it in for me and was filing false reports trying to get me into trouble. So at least I can put that to rest.
And now I'm mortified. Mortified that he did this (let's face it, he'll deny it to his dying day, but I know in my heart that he spanked the crap out of my son that day). Mortified that this behavior is still going on, only now I'm not there to stop it. Mortified that the social worker will be contacting him over the next couple of days trying to get a personal interview set up with him, and now he's going to be even more agitated than normal. She advised me to get a babysitter for Sunday if I have to work that day. Great. And mortified that this could ultimately result in him being barred from any visitation with them at all, and even though I had nothing to do with it, you can bet he'll sure as hell make ME pay for it. She said that they will evaluate the situation and offer him a range of support services (anger management, parenting classes, counseling, whatever they see fit). If he refuses, they will take him to family court, which could result in him losing custody and visitation rights. And I'm sure that'll just make him feel happy as a clam.
And so I still want to vomit.
They weren't investigating me, they were investigating Shitfoot. The daycare workers reported him--they're mandatory reporters, after all. The story goes something like: Shitfoot was highly agitated and angry when dropping off the kids, and swore at them when they stopped him to ask him about some paperwork. DS was crying, and told a staff member that his daddy had hit him. They reported red marks on his arms, red marks like finger-tips on his back, and his bottom was "very red". DS told workers that daddy had hit him before, but he was not afraid to go home with him. The marks were not there when the social worker got there to check him out. Workers told her that they were concerned that in private, Shitfoot might be taking the discipline too far.
So she wanted to know if I thought it was possible that Shitfoot hurt the kids, etc. Naturally, I'm relieved that this wasn't about anything I did. I knew I hadn't done anything, but I had this whole paranoid idea that someone had it in for me and was filing false reports trying to get me into trouble. So at least I can put that to rest.
And now I'm mortified. Mortified that he did this (let's face it, he'll deny it to his dying day, but I know in my heart that he spanked the crap out of my son that day). Mortified that this behavior is still going on, only now I'm not there to stop it. Mortified that the social worker will be contacting him over the next couple of days trying to get a personal interview set up with him, and now he's going to be even more agitated than normal. She advised me to get a babysitter for Sunday if I have to work that day. Great. And mortified that this could ultimately result in him being barred from any visitation with them at all, and even though I had nothing to do with it, you can bet he'll sure as hell make ME pay for it. She said that they will evaluate the situation and offer him a range of support services (anger management, parenting classes, counseling, whatever they see fit). If he refuses, they will take him to family court, which could result in him losing custody and visitation rights. And I'm sure that'll just make him feel happy as a clam.
And so I still want to vomit.
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